If you’re expecting a bunch of black magic tricks or coordinates to Cupid’s arrows, you should click away right about now. But if you’re here to do all you can to try and win this person over, you’ve come to the right place. Is there a way to make someone fall in love with you without getting the voodoo books out? We’re not sure what your definition of ‘love’ is, but we sure can help you put your best foot forward.
Can you make someone fall in love with you?
What are you thinking? A little dose of magic potion mixed in their drinks every day and they come running to confess their feelings for you? That would be really effective and all but unfortunately, we don’t live in the wizarding world of Hogwarts. There is no way to say for sure that you can make someone fall in love with you. But we are not asking you to give up. Like many other psychological emotions, love can also be controlled to some extent. In fact, psychologists have gone out on a limb to invoke the feelings of love between two strangers in a laboratory setup. Have you heard about Arthur Aron’s 36 questions that lead to love? Once two people answer this highly personal set of questions with utmost honesty, followed by 4 minutes of eye contact, it’s bound to manifest signs of intimacy, if not create love in an instant. Just like this, you can exploit psychology to your advantage and get an edge on your potential partner’s list of favorite people. Playing hard to get for instance works like a charm on some people, more so if they are not good at being ignored. My friend Natalie says, “It’s my go-to move and it’s fool-proof, I tell you. The more you run away, the more they will chase you. It just makes you 10 times more desirable without any effort. Someone who has been hurt before hesitates to fall for another person again. To show them what they are about to miss by giving up on you, playing hard to get almost never fails.” So can you make someone fall in love with you? Well, we think it’s safe to say that you can try to make genuine efforts consistently, and let them see how much they mean to you. Leave the rest to fate, hoping the universe will reward your persistence some day.
How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You – 13 Tried And Tested Tips
Okay, fine, you probably didn’t meet this person by bumping into them and having your stack of papers flying about around you. In all likelihood, that dating app match you got resulted in two good dates and now you’re trying to make someone fall in love with you through text. Hang on for just a minute, though. Are you even sure you like this person or are there clear signs of infatuation all over the place? No, eye contact for 1.7 seconds doesn’t equate to love. A shared love for pizza and Oreo ice cream does not warrant an “OMG, we have so much in common!” The point is, figure out if it’s actually love you feel toward this person or if a temporary infatuation has taken hold of you. Speaking of things to consider while you’re trying to figure out how to make someone fall in love with you, understand that you can’t really ‘make’ them do anything. Then what’s the point of asking, “Is there a way to make someone fall in love with you?” Well yes, yes there is. You may not have this person enchanted under your spell, but at least you can increase your chances of getting what you really want: someone to watch TV with at all times. Now that the PSA is over (sorry), let’s get into how you can get someone to be absolutely OBSESSED with you. We’re kidding, of course. At most, they’re going to reply a bit faster to your texts. Kidding again. But if you’re lucky, you might just get into a happy, healthy relationship with them. Let’s roll the dice.
1. Fix yourself first
Got any issues? Fix them. Are you someone who is scared of commitments or someone who has an insecure attachment style? The whole ‘how to make someone fall in love with you’ psychology isn’t going to work if you’re a ball of anxiety on the first date, always trying to nervously look away from any eye contact you establish. Issues you have with your mental state aren’t like the engine light on your car’s dashboard that you conveniently ignore. Or the suspicious noise from the engine that you successfully avoid by turning the music up louder. So do find a way to tone down the intensity of these problems that often come in the way of your love life.
2. Be your best self
Are you trying to figure out how to make someone fall in love with you without talking to them? Do you want that first glance connection, when you look at each other through a crowded room and immediately know there’s something there? You’re only going to get someone to look at you when you’re happy with yourself. When you’re your best self, happy and exuding positive vibes, you’re going to attract similar energy too. Look after yourself, get a haircut, lift a few weights, and nail that upcoming presentation at work. Bonus tip: Does this person like it when you wear your hair in a particular manner? You already know that’s what you’re getting the next time you go for a haircut.
3. Get into the things they love
Are they the biggest baseball fan ever? You better read up on Babe Ruth so you can babe them up some day. Are they the biggest Grey’s Anatomy fan? I know, 18 seasons sounds like a lot, but you should probably try and get into it. The more things you two have in common, the easier it’ll be to start a conversation with this person. This way, you’ll make sure you won’t be texting them “Sooo…what’s up?” every twenty minutes. Avoid being a dry texter at all costs, it won’t get you anywhere.
4. But maintain your own personality too
Just because you’re getting into the things they like, doesn’t mean you let go of the things that make you, you. Don’t get so absorbed in the 18 seasons of Grey’s Anatomy that you blow off that CrossFit class you love going to. To make someone fall in love with you without them knowing about it, you need to be as interesting as possible. Talk about when you were backpacking across western Europe and saw a beautiful woman wailing while bathing herself. They won’t even realize how intrigued they are. Joey Tribbiani would be proud of you!
5. Don’t just lend, give them your ear
When they’re talking, listen. How to make someone fall in love with you is really as simple as that. In your quest to try to impress and engage this person with your fascinating travel stories, don’t forget to listen to them when they’re talking. If a conversation feels like you’re just waiting for them to finish talking so you can continue to speak, they’re probably waiting for it to get over so they can continue avoiding you. Listen, and make it clear that you’re invested in whatever they’re saying. Especially when you’re trying to make someone fall in love with you long-distance, conversing with them is one of the best methods you have. So when you do pull up those video calls or even on text, make sure you attentively listen to everything they’re saying.
6. Make them feel validated
And while you’re listening (or reading their chats), validate their experiences, struggles, and accomplishments. Most of the time, they’re not coming to you for solutions until they ask you, “What should I do? Can you help?” When you do it right, you can improve any relationship by listening. Someone who has been hurt before might have a hard time believing that they are worthy of love. Take your chance to make them feel special, treat them like they’re the most interesting person in the building, and make them feel supported. Sometimes, to make someone fall in love with you without talking much, all you need to do is nod your head and say, “That sucks, I’m so sorry.”
7. Make someone fall in love with you without talking by letting your eyes express
If you’re on your phone while they’re passionately talking about that time they won the spelling bee, they’re probably not going to follow it up with another story. Look into their eyes more often, establish eye contact, and let them know you’re not nervous to the point where you have to avoid their gaze (even if you are). Studies say couples that share more affection, look into each other’s eyes more often than those who don’t. Put the research-validated ‘how to make someone fall in love with you’ psychology to good use and look them in the eye.
8. Make someone fall in love with you through texts by not replying instantly
We know, we know. The sudden release of dopamine when you see their name come up on your phone is unparalleled. While you may want to immediately open their text and reply to them, that’s not really how you make someone fall in love with you through texts. Manifest some self-restraint here, my friend. Especially if they replied to you after a couple of hours. Don’t make them feel you’re always available; they might end up taking you for granted. Take some time and reply when you know you can have a conversation with them.
9. But don’t act like you don’t care
There’s a fine line between trying to not seem desperate and ending up manipulating them through a scarcity mindset. If you make them feel you’re intentionally withdrawing communication for hours/days on end, they probably won’t appreciate it a whole lot. When figuring out how to make someone fall in love with you, the key is to find the right balance in communication. Don’t text them 2 seconds after they send you a text, but don’t make them wait 1.5 business days either.
10. Being nice is how you make someone fall in love with you
Not only will a genuine smile make them think you’re interested, but studies also claim that you’re more attractive when you smile. Think about it, you probably wouldn’t talk to someone who’s always in a bad mood, would you? So the next time you go up to this person you’re crushing over, make sure you’re donning an infectious smile. You’ll be making them fall in love with you without them knowing it. Who knew a smile could end up being all you need? Plus, you look hotter while doing it too.
11. Touch them, but do it appropriately
While we’re on the subject of ‘how to make someone fall in love with you’ psychology, studies claim couples that indulge in more physical affection tend to be more satisfied overall. Plus, it’s also one of the best ways to show affection. Although, be careful about this if you’re not very close to this person. A hug and a casual hand on the back is okay if you’re already good friends and might see the sparks flying about, but putting your hand on this person’s shoulder at work may seem like the weirdest thing in the world. Read the room. If you’re looking to make someone fall in love with you long-distance, however, don’t get too disheartened by this point. You can always hop on a video call and greet them with that killer smile you got going on.
12. Prove that you’re trustworthy and you care
When you want to make someone fall in love with you long-distance, or even when you’re close by, proving that you’re worth their time and trust is paramount. Nobody likes a phony who promises big dreams to make someone fall in love through text and then fails to show up when it comes to action. Would you want to be involved with someone who actively tells you they’re a commitment-phobe? You could probably try to subtly drop it in a conversation, “I’m done with the whole sleeping around thing. I’d love to have a meaningful connection with someone.” Even someone who is scared to fall in love again, owing to their past trauma, might think twice about this genuine statement before completely waving you off their mind.
13. Go to Disneyland together
Okay, not necessarily Disneyland. The point is to spend some quality time with this person. Go out on dates with them (if you still haven’t asked them out, what are you waiting for?), do things with them that they like doing, and have a laugh together. You can use all the ‘how to make someone fall in love with you’ psychology tricks, but unless you actually spend time with this person, you’re not going to get the ball rolling. How to make someone fall in love with you can really be as easy as looking into their eyes and smiling. Be careful, though, you don’t want to end up looking like a serial killer smiling at his next victim. Be yourself, take a shower, and spend some time with them. Go get ’em, tiger!