Not because you don’t want to get better, but because you don’t know how to. Your friends may tell you about all the fish in the sea or that elusive new club you should go to, but finding the motivation to embrace the many prospects your newly single status brings with it can often be the hardest part. By now, you probably know that your breakup buddies Ben (& Jerry) and Jack (Daniels) can’t give you the answers you need....
Dear You, I admit you had cheated, and you admit that too. And when I call you my Cheater and not my Lover, you know it pains. It shatters the silence between us. And then the silence fills in again. I can’t breathe. Nor can you. And we part our ways… But don’t you realise that an act however grave it is, can’t burn to ashes a relationship? A relationship can’t die, for it is not bound by physical boundaries....
When inviting someone over to your dorm room was the most intimate thing you could do and getting high together was just as good as taking a trip together, dating in college definitely had its charm. Even if all you could afford to give your lover was a button and a handkerchief on their birthday. As you might have noticed, dating as an adult seems starkly different from your wild college stories....
It’s the slightest fragrance or even a simple song that associates with your ex and makes you miss those moments. The intensity and length of these feelings will be based on the type of your relationship and how things ended. Hence, the dumper and the dumpee miss their ex in different stages of the breakup. These feelings can be very secretive or obvious at some point. This depends on if you have already moved on or not because your feelings can really create illusionary expectations....
In fact, it wouldn’t be a stretch to claim that all of the other components of a successful and healthy relationship are sustained by emotional integrity. If right about now, you’re wondering, “Now, what the hell is that?”, fret not, it’s not some unheard of mumbo-jumbo. Chances are you’re already practicing or striving for emotional integrity in your relationships and may not even know it. For the sake of helping you operate from a place of self-awareness in fostering wholesome connections, psychotherapist Dr Aman Bhonsle (PhD, PGDTA), who specializes in relationship counseling and Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy writes about different facets of emotional integrity in relationships....
In doing so, are you playing with fire that can catch your marriage in its spate? What are the risks of reconnecting with an old love who is married? Does rekindling your connection with an old flame indicate there is trouble in your marital paradise? Or is it possible to build a genuine friendship where a romantic connection once existed? We spoke to counseling psychologist Kavita Panyam (Masters in Psychology and international affiliate with the American Psychological Association), who has been helping couples work through their relationship issues for over two decades, for a clearer understanding of the risks and pitfalls one needs to be mindful of when reconnecting with an ex....
The mysterious partner, the knight in shining armor, the lost babe in the woods…all of this is a load of nonsense popular culture has fed us. The perfect partner does not exist and you are inviting disappointment if you think you are blessed enough to find one. Movies and songs might endlessly obsess over love at first sight, but we all know that’s not how things happen. Friendship in marriage is not romanticized, but it is the best blessing one can get....
How did I come to online sex chats? Before I tell you about my online sexual rendezvous, let me take you to my background. I come from a very middle-class conservative family. I married when I was 21, it was an arranged marriage. My husband was 22. I graduated a month back and the next thing I knew was that I was married. At 21 and 22, my husband and I were too young to take the responsibility of marriage....
When you’re in a long-term relationship, a few tumultuous twists and turns along the way are to be expected. Sometimes the swerve from the happy, content connection is minor and manageable, at others, it can bring you to a crossroads that can leave you second-guessing your compatibility as a couple and the future of your relationship. Infidelity, breach of trust, losing the spark, toxic patterns, abusive tendencies, poor or broken down communication or simply feeling that you’ve drifted apart are some of the reasons that can brew trouble in paradise....
Most couples understand that communication is important for a healthy relationship. But most people don’t know that good communication takes practice. My partner and I have been dating for nine months, and though our communication is stronger than it was four months ago, it’s a skill that no couple ever stops developing. Talking about your individual struggles and digging into your relationship issues rather than pretending they don’t exist can strengthen your partnership and ensure that no one’s feeling shut out....
For those who wonder, “Why am I jealous in a relationship?” the explanation is in the words of famous author William Penn, “The jealous are troublesome to others but a torment to themselves.” Yes, it is also one of the most common human emotions that each of us experience now and then. However, when one person operates from a place of obsessive jealousy, the equation between partners can become overwhelmingly toxic....
To help you figure out how to snap the chord when your lives are so closely intertwined, we talked to emotional wellness and mindfulness coach Pooja Priyamvada (certified in Psychological and Mental Health First Aid from Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health and the University of Sydney), who specializes in counseling for extramarital affairs, breakups, separation, grief, and loss, to name a few. When To End A Relationship The end of a relationship can be an unnerving thought, especially when you’ve been together a long time....
I Decided To Be A Stay-At-Home Dad When our daughter turned five, we decided that one of the parents should be at home while the other worked to keep the kitchen fire burning. We didn’t want to leave her in the care of a nanny while we were away chasing our respective careers, so instead of Nancy leaving her job and becoming a stay-at-home mom, I decided to become a stay-at-home dad to be with our daughter....
Is it normal to have a crush on an older woman? My encounters with the female gender had, in the past, been quite disastrous. This is because I am an introvert. I strongly believe that the art of conversation is something only a few people possess, while the rest of us are left wishing for it. Even during our client visits, she would do most of the talking while I chipped in with nods and “hmms....
So, the ‘naming and shaming game’ continues. This time, it’s our India facing the flak for being the world’s most unsafe country for women. If the recent poll of 548 people conducted online, by phone and in person between March 26th March-May 4th comprising Europe, Africa, the Americas, South East Asia, South Asia and the Pacific, were to be believed, India is an unsafe nation for women. The respondents included aid professionals, academicians, healthcare staff, non-government organisation workers, policy-makers, development specialists and social commentators....
However, from your point of view, your feelings for ex may be a thing of the past, you’re over that phase and value your friendship now more than your past romantic relationship. But think, long and hard, are your partner’s concerns truly unfounded? And is there a way you can make your partner understand how you feel? Can it have repercussions for your current relationship? Talking To An Ex If You Are In A Serious Relationship “My ex and I are best friends, and honestly, my husband doesn’t mind if I talk to my exes....
This time, it’s the case of a young techie in Bangalore who took his life, allegedly over a bad review of his performance at work. A few weeks ago, it was the case of mass suicide by a family of 11 that shook the nation and once again put the focus on questions regarding mental health, belief, faith et al. However, despite mental health becoming a major talking point now in the media (at least as compared to earlier), why are the cases and thoughts of suicide increasing?...
Value differences are not “stupid” to worry about. And if something is valuable to you, you must try to reasonably achieve it in and for your own life. I understand that setting aside value differences with people you love is harder to do, whether it is debating which political party to vote for or which habits are not the most functional in life to have. Value differences become even harder to handle when they are with our spouses....
Dear Counsellor, My in-laws expect me to do housework and look after the children. My husband works in another city and comes back only for weekends. My mother-in-law gives me the silent treatment when he is away and tries to involve him in household chores when he comes for the weekend. This is not my husband’s first marriage. He has two children from a previous marriage, who were raised by their grandparents....
To understand this behavior, we talked to psychologist Pragati Sureka (MA in Clinical Psychology, professional credits from Harvard Medical School), who specializes in addressing issues like anger management, parenting issues, and abusive and loveless marriage through emotional ability resources. She talked us through narcissism and love bombing, abuse cycles, examples and solutions. What Is Narcissistic Love Bombing? Pragati talks to us about the genesis of this term to better understand its essence....
